I Am Alive, Therefore I Am Strong.


Gah! Allergies are actually back and it’s killing me.

Well, it’s bullshark. Not killing me literally but that feeling of itching it to the highest level, like there’s no tomorrow. Also, I get a bit annoyed, too. Hahahaha!

I have dishydrotic eczema, if I am not mistaken. That was the diagnosis of my third doctor but I am not sure coz I never paid much attention when he explained it to my bio parents.

The first 9years was the crucial part; had to change doctors every week to start with, and changed doctors six times. Not even sure if that was the right number though.

It wasn’t just the allergies that got me, but heaps of infections. Almost had surgery for wrong diagnosis, doctors told me I got appendicitis. Blessed that we don’t have much financially, so my biological parents sent me to the ward instead and that lead me to the right doctor and diagnosed me that my urinary tract had an infection. Huzza! Hahaha

I still can remember vividly how I thought about having my tissues cut off for operation and as to how I’d survive the post operation thingy.

Weird! And I hate the feeling. Hahahaha!

But wait, there’s more! I’ve got more and more infection, too. In some parts of my body, nodes got infected and it was really painful. I don’t know how much pain there will be in the coming days and I remember asking and pleading to God to take away the pains.. And ironically, instead of taking it away, it’s the other way around. There’s not just one but rather, one after the other. And it happened more than five times. And dealing with the pain is also painful too. Hahaha. What a life!

It didn’t stopped just yet. In between those times, I don’t just get fever and infections but also there’s tonsillitis. Hands are sore, nodes are sore, and I can’t even eat or drink that well.. Those were the days hey!

I got depressed and got tired of being sick and tired.

Until one day, I just lifted it all up and asked God for strength instead. If God can’t stop pain from coming in, I prayed to Him and plead for strength instead.

Looking back on those days, sometimes makes me laugh.. And sometimes makes me wonder as to how I have survived it all.

There were not just infection but more than that, I almost died.. But God’s so good and He didn’t let me. So I am still here. Alive, kicking and stronger!

Ah! The joys of living! Hehehehe

I have been healed years ago and now things are way way better these days than that of how I was years ago.

Thankyou God for helping me out.. For sending Your instruments to help me and heal me. For extending my life and for me to become an inspiration to others and become an instrument of Your great love.

I know this pain I am going through these times are way better than those pain I’ve been through years ago. Thankyou for everything God!

Even when in pain, I will never get tired of proclaiming Your glory and honour.

Things will be okay, in His time 🙂


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We can't choose what stays and fades away. So cherish every moment, pray, love, live and laugh like it's the last. – SM

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